Flash Fiction: Less of You

The following is a response to Chuck Wendig’s SPAMMERPUNK HORROR Flash Fiction Challenge. If you’re not following Chuck on Twitter, you’re missing out on some great stuff!


From: rachel@nodiets.com
To: rob@robboley.com
Subject: Lose 20 Pounds Today – NO DIETING!

Hi, I’m Rachel. Are you tired of being overweight? Do you hate the obese monster lurking in the mirror? Are you trapped in a compulsive cycle of dieting and overeating? I was once, too, until I opted for real, permanent change in my life.

But don’t take my word for it. Read these testimonials from our satisfied clients:

“I needed to lose 20 lbs in one week for a reunion. Rachel showed me how to lose it in just ONE HOUR. I doubted her at first. I tried resisting. But I woke up a new woman—and 23 lbs. lighter. She cut off the extra three pounds for free!” – Janet Needles, Hannibal, NY

“I was 300 lbs on the verge of suicide when Janet found me. She gave me one pill. It changed my life. It devoured my fat in just three months. My friends didn’t understand It. They called It a parasite. I call It a blessing.” – Randy Schumacher, Dayton, OH

“Randy scooped out all the extra bits I didn’t need. Sure, it hurt at first. Then he scooped out the parts that hurt, too. I lost 155 lbs. I once hated myself. Now, I feel nothing at all. And I look great!” – Bernice Coalson, Gunnison, CO

You could be our next success story. There are more of us every day. Tomorrow, there could be less of you. Contact me now. Let me help.


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